I Feel Fantastic:

The short synopsis of "I Feel Fantastic" depicts a dressed up robot in a room singing the words 'I feel fantastic, hey hey hey. You are fantastic' on a loop with ambiguous phrases interspersed throughout. The phrases are believed to be 'please leave,' and 'run run run.' The robot changes positions and outfits, strange music plays in the background, and towards the end a slow zoom-in to a pile of leaves in the back yard is cut in.

Digging a little deeper you will come to find out that the robot is actually named Tara The Android. One rumor explaining the video is that Tara's creator is really a serial killer that dresses Tara in the clothes of his victims. The killer became frustrated by his captive's pleas and screams, so he programs Tara to say "I feel fantastic," to align with how he wished his victims would  react to their own murder. The shot of the backyard is clearly alluding to where he has buried the bodies. That grass looks soft as fuck if you ask me.

The best explanation, however, starts with a visit to http://www.geocities.ws/androidmusicvideos/ which is a website advertising a singing robot named Tara from 2006. A few of the audio samples are still available, and evidently you can purchase 15 minutes worth of video for $11 on androidworld.com as the videos are no longer available on the geocities site. I'd consider buying it myself but I really dont want this guy to know where I live, and I'll be god damned if this thing shows up as VHS.

Who's to say if this fellow decided to make a fucked up video, or if some other sadist took his original singing android video and edited in some bonus footage of a yard. One of the audio clips is titled 'brutal v 1' so I'm guessing it's an inside job. Either way, the creator of Tara is named John Bergeron, so if I come up missing, start there.

The second theory references Pygmalion, a Cypriot sculptor of Greek mythology. Failing to properly worship the goddess Aphrodite, the daughters of Propoetus were punished by being made to sell that smug vag. Put-off, and clearly not overreacting, Pygmalion swears off women, and falls in love with a statue he created. Pygmalion buys Aphrodite a Benz or some shit, and she goes ahead and brings his sculpture to life so he can marry it and have statue-babies. Standard. The thought is that the creator of this video could be a modern day Pygmalion.

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© 2016 Brandon Shack-Harris